Wrapper: Ecuadorian Habano
Binder: Dominican
Filler: Nicaraguan, USA
Size: 7 x 40 Lancero
Strength: Medium
Price: $13.00
This cigar has one month of naked humi time.
I received this cigar in the Luxury Cigar Club Palladium Subscription box of 5 different brands.
I’ve decided to use the weekend to review unicorns or cigars that were so limited that if you blinked, they were gone. Basically, a complete waste of your time…and maybe mine.
But I have the blend on record in case they ever return to the scene of the crime.
My laptop hard drive crashed and burned on Tuesday. I tried to get it fixed but I am in a war of words with the manufacturer. I bought another laptop. I’m back. Golf clap.
BACKGROUND:
This is the strangest critter and company I’ve come across.
No info that I could find even on its own website. Just a guy dressed in a bunny suit.
From all indications, this blend was developed in hand with Luxury Cigar Club.
THE WHOLE MEGILLAH:
I am a devoted fan of Lanceros. Done right, they can be an infestation of bold flavors and rich complexity…or not. Depends on who blends them.
I can’t smell a damn thing from the wrapper…except dung and strawberries. This can’t be right.
The cigar is extremely light in the hand, and I expect a quick smoke. Jinx.
The draw is like a wide-open plastic straw. My PerfecDraw draw adjustment tool slinks away in anger.
The open draw provides flavors of strawberries, cream, and dung. Alrighty then.
A nice creamy start along with notes of cinnamon oatmeal, biscuits, and no zing from any source of spiciness.
Moments later, black pepper arrives. Just enough for a piggyback ride.
The burn is sloppy…nearly criminal.
4 minutes and an inch in. Not getting the love I desire.
If the burn continues at this rate, the 7” cigar will be gone in 28 minutes or less.
This is a friggin $13 stick. And so far, it performs a like a bargain bin cigar.
And it keeps going out.
Whoever is in the bunny suit has a total of 11 different blends. I hope they are better than this stinker.
This is not how I envisioned getting back to reviewing after 4 days off.
No sign of complexity. No transitions. The finish is slightly pleasant. But is this a premium cigar? Nah.
Ben isn’t going to like my review of this stick which is in his Palladium subscription. But da truth is da truth. But this is the first time I’ve gotten a dud in his monthly collection.
The burn is a disgrace and should go to bed without its pudding.
The burn slows down because I need to keep relighting it. So, keeping time makes no sense at this point. 1-1/2” down and a laborious 5-1/2” to go. But then…the monster could come to life at any point. Uh-huh.
It keeps going out. Yeah, we’ve had some humid days in Milwaukee but the other cigars I’ve dry boxed smoked perfectly.
Maybe if there was just a tad bit more tobacco in this cigar, it would stay lit.
Meanwhile, the dead ash is hard as a rock and defies leaving the mother ship.
Linear as a slide rule.
I can’t believe how that mention dates me. Had to use one in college. What a pain.
Oh yeah, the strength is mild/medium. Thrilling.
Barry White. “Can’t Get Enough.” How appropriate…in a twisted sort of way.
Fruity. Like Dr. Rod. Creamy. Black pepper Lite. Graham cracker. That’s All Folks!
This is a poor imitation of a $13 cigar. I do not like eviscerating a review cigar. Ruins my morning. It ain’t no fun reporting a dud to you my dear readers. It just becomes, “Danger Will Robinson.”
In the time it took to write the above sentence, the cigar goes out. Fuck me.
I’m right willing and able to ditch this cigar right now.
There is zero forward momentum. It just lays there like my first wife. A “Crabalocker fishwife. Pornographic priestess. Boy, you’ve been a naughty girl, you let your knickers down.”
Couldn’t find a single written review of any of this guy’s blends. Big woop. I did find a YouTube review and the owner is Justin Buné who supposedly has a big cult following. Maybe it’s time to hand out the Kool-Aid.
I can’t deal with the constant relighting.
The cigar isn’t soft and squishy which would signify too much humidity.
4-1/2” to go and you can stick a fork in me. My frustration level with this cigar is too much.
Despite this cigar being a turd, the Luxury Cigar Club Palladium Subscription is still a good deal. But Ben, do not include another Bunny Droppings blend again, please.
And oh yeah, please frequent my sponsors…they need the dough: Small Batch Cigar, Atlantic Cigar, Cigar Page, and Luxury Cigar Club.
RATING: 45
Discover more from Cigar Reviews by the Katman
Subscribe to get the latest posts sent to your email.
Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS
