Wrapper: Nicaraguan Habano Oscuro 2000
Binder: Nicaraguan Corojo ‘99
Filler: Nicaraguan Criollo ‘98
Size: 7 x 38 Lancero
Strength: Medium
Price: $17.17
My cigars have had 3 months of naked humidor time.
BACKGROUND:
From Luxury Cigar Club:
“This is the same blend used by brothers Billy and Gus in their Viva La Vida cigar line created by AJ Fernandez, but in a unique VLV Lancero Vitola created for and sold exclusively by us.”
Short but sweet.
THE WHOLE MEGILLAH:
Aromas don’t scream fire in a crowded theater but still grab me by the Narglies so I can’t make an orderly exit. The aromas are delicate and fragile…milk chocolate, smoked paprika, butterscotch, raisins, a dab of floral, cedar, and vanilla.
Most Lanceros…the good ones, always seem to have an issue with packed tobacco, and this is where my PerfecDraw draw adjustment tool comes in handy. Donning my surgical mask and best bedazzled thong, I proceed carefully. One arctic drill motion later, the slight draw interference is cleared. As is in most cases, the plug is squatting right where the cigar band occurs. Good to go.
Lift off is immediate. No fucking around. Immediate depth of intricate flavors spread in a Stooge-like movement. Nyuck. Creamy, spicy cinnamon, black cherries, espresso, smoky campfire wood, chocolate covered raisins, malt, and conjugal nuttiness.
Strength is medium.
The Krainerwurst is meaty and smoky with a nice blast of black pepper spiciness.
Complex geometry begins and travels down the wannabe parabola a centimeter at a time. The blend is on the verge of being left its father’s wealth, making it a very rich cigar.
Lanceros have the tendency to go out easily. Not this Weisswurst. I can type away and it stays lit. Not a monumental achievement…but relighting a cigar over and over can ruin a man’s fun with something long, and on fire.
I have experienced the flavor of bacon on previous Vivas and it happens here too. Makes me hungry. I love bacon. But as I’m old and always grateful to awaken in the morning, bacon has become a luxury rarely imbibed. Staying away from salt will add years to your life too…he says as he drops dead from a pigeon strike.
Shit, such a delicious blend. The medium strength provides a stable platform for just an avalanche of flavors that find their way into transitions and finish. At $17 a pop, it better be showing me a good time with a happy ending.
Lanceros are typically intense versions of their earlier selves. Yet, I have some Rocky Patel lanceros that just suck. Being anorexic and bulimic didn’t help the crap tobacco.
2-1/4” burned. 30 minutes.
Sweet spots dot the horizon like tracer bullets. But in this case, you want to raise your head from the confines of the trench and take one to the forehead.
Black grapes. It was a raisiny thing…but now the tart and juicy incarnations reappear as the Cosmic Muffin intended. Yes, I know things.
The char line is a thing of beauty. A made man wouldn’t eat a cannoli within a block of this cigar.
Milwaukee County has a population of almost a million people. And not one…not one, Jewish deli. It’s like living in Cell Block D with the Aryan Brotherhood doing the cooking. I have sought out serious bagel outlets and I almost shat myself when I saw that a dozen bagels go for $55 plus shipping. I don’t know what it is about Americans that they must have sugar in everything for it to taste good. A real NYC bagel, or bialy, has no sugar in it…as G-d intended. But then I swore off carbs a few years ago, so just as well. Ben of Luxury Cigar Club lives in Phoenix and there is a great bagel place in Scottsdale. I should hold his next exclusive blend hostage until he sends me a dozen.
The cigar is growing back. I’ve only burned 2-1/2” and I am impaled with such an immense sweet spot that my foreskin grows back. Strange. It’s black. I have a surprise for Charlotte that I know she will love.
In 2007, I project managed a 10-story existing building rehab. A jobsite ladder collapsed with me at the top. It spanned from the high roof to the low roof…about 9′-0. Threw me to the slab and I landed on unprotected vertical rebar that impaled my right hand. #4 rebar entered the palm of my hand and went straight through. I was pinned. The workers panicked, as I was right on the edge of the roof, so they began to pull my legs to bring me to safety. Again, I was pinned, and no one noticed this. I began screaming. I thought they were going to sling shot me off the roof. Instead of calling an ambulance, the dunce job superintendent put me in his own car and got lost in downtown Chicago trying to find the hospital…meanwhile I was spurting blood. First time ever that I could hold my hand up to my eyes and look through it. Good times.
Rich and creamy. Savory v. Sweet are comin’ home, mama.
Smoky, chocolaty, BBQ spices, fresh black grapes, black pepper, caramel, mixed nuts, and real Italian espresso.
The complexity is damn intense. The finish carries the weight nicely. Dog smackin’ my lips incessantly. Don’t ever do this with friends. They’ll call your wife.
Halfway point. 50 minutes. You don’t want to buy a $17 Lancero that finishes in 35 minutes.
Joists are erected to support the heft of the richness. So many layers. The blend slows down my consumption of cigar to mouth as the finish is deeply rooted in splendid notes that refuse to taper or disappear.
The second half is where the money is. Just crazy nuts. A true flavor bomb encrusted with pearls of colored spices.
This cigar gives some excellent $30 cigars a run for their money.
And with my promo code, the price drops to a friendlier $14.50.
Bona fide flavor bombs appear as rarely as a politician telling the truth.
No matter how long I allow the cigar to rest in my ashtray, it stays lit. Exquisite construction.
Dylan’s tune, “If Not for You.” Great song. So many artists recorded this tune. George Harrison did a cool version. In 1966, I conned my way into a Byrds concert at The Golden Bear in Huntington Beach. I spent both sets backstage in the dressing room and wandering freely taking photos. Dylan showed up. David Crosby liked me for some reason and looked after me between sets. He introduced me to Mr. Dylan. I was awe struck and nothing intelligent came out of my mouth. I also got to hold Roger McGuinn’s 12 string Rickenbacker. Jingle Jangle. The article I wrote for Tiger Beat Magazine was rejected.
Yeah, I’m killing time. This damn cigar is bliss on a shingle.
This Lancero is nothing like the regular versions of the Viva. It stands above them like Mussolini speaking to the throngs
I’ve not had to relight this cigar once. Not once.
2-1/4” to go. 75 minutes of harmonious bliss.
The important thing to remember is to allow this stick to meld into your humidor for 2-3 months. Smoking one before that will rob you of the real blender’s intent.
Fucking great cigar.
The strength verges on medium/full but never really plants its flag. Instead, the intensity of flavors just heads for the clouds at Mach 10.
The cigar wilts at 100 minutes. I sit here stunned.
This cigar can only be had at Luxury Cigar Club. Promo code, ‘katman’, will get you 15% off.
RATING: 96
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Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS
