Wrapper: Brazilian Mata Fina
Binder: Nicaraguan
Filler: Nicaraguan, Brazilian
Size: 6 X 54 Toro
Strength: Medium/Full
Price: $10.00 (As little as $7 online)
My cigars have received 4 months of naked humidor time.
BACKGROUND:
Released 2022.
Regular production.
“The H. Upmann Nicaragua AJ Fernandez Heritage has been extra aged with a triple fermented Mata Fina wrapper. aged two years after it was rolled to deliver a medium to full-bodied smoke with rich notes of chocolate, espresso and some sweet spice.”
THE WHOLE MEGILLAH:
I ran out of batteries for my butt plug so I’m going to do this review sans plug.
It is Monday throwaway cigar review day…just busy work to keep me conscious. Thank you, thank you very much…you may exit the Max 9 from the surprise opening on your left.
The cigar is a banter weight. My PerfecDraw is on sabbatical in the south of France. I use a potato peeler instead. Not the same. I eagerly await my PD’s return. I will knit it some mini condoms.
This is another AJ blend in the guise of an AJ blend. Is there anything spectacular waiting…probably not. Will it be a good knockaround cigar that you can smoke and not care if you must suddenly dump it…probably. So, let’s see. If you don’t want to read me, and this is quite understandable, scroll baby scroll.
Lovely start. Very flavorful with notes of Arabica, dark chocolate, supreme nuttiness, potent black pepper, spicy cinnamon, black raisins, and something fruity. (There are so many jokes in that last element, but I shall exercise restraint).
Creamy chocolate nougat appears ala a Three Musketeers bar. Makes me hungry like a wolf.
In college, I worked a month for an asshole who owned a computer company. Rare in 1969. One task was cleaning his pool. He had two wolves. Huge animals. Both females. One was a docile creature, but the other was an alpha. The fuckers chased me every time I ran for the enclosed pool area. I responded by screaming like a little girl. This is why the gig was merely a moment in time.
A subtle richness molts into a charming hint of complexity. I failed poetry class in college. But the chicks were accommodating. So, there’s that. Of course, in the 60’s you could say any manner of bullshit and the girls would swoon. I was a bad boy.
The cigar holds on creaminess, chocolate, espresso, and black pepper…with just a suggestion of sweet, dried fruit. I like this cigar. It is proving to be the perfect go to stick. It is amazing when you think of the gabillion ways that AJ manages to get something interesting from Nic puros. Even better when he inserts Brazilian tobacco. I’m a fan of the pungent and fragrant rainforest leaves. In the right hands, it guarantees a flawless balance of Sweet v. Savory.
The sugary notes are pruney. Way Back Machine. As a young man, I played in a very cool 4 piece that did a bunch of gigs at Chino Prison. Inmates took our snack fruit to make their alcohol-based elixir. You let the stuff rot in a pail for a couple of months so that it ferments and then you drink it to get an intense hallucinogenic buzz. Saw the Manson girls at the gigs. Freaky Deaky.
Light complexity but it is the richness that conquers the day. A slow roll which is fine by me. 2”. 40 minutes. I smoked a couple too soon in the arena of only a month or two. Must let this blend rest to seek optimum output.
Smokers are looking for guidance. Not just your bloody opinion. Show the dodgy humidor time.
I still use some of the slang from my days in the U.K. In turn, I introduced the Amerikanski term ‘asshole’ to the lexicon of my circle. Pretty sure they are still using it.
It is -36 degrees. I stepped outside to get the newspaper. My nuts froze like a first-class margarita. Fortunately, it will flame out at a balmy -15 by this afternoon. I have seen born and bred Wisconsinites walk around in shorts and flip flops. No shit.
Every cigar reviewer found the exact same flavor points. AJ is reliable. No mysteries.
The halfway point. Strength morphed from medium to medium/full. I can feel the transition in my dwindling nerve endings. A simple complexity is in play. And the richness of the Brazilian tobacco makes for a handsome smoke. You’ll like it. This is an overlooked blend you might want to revisit.
99.9% of cigar reviewers are very serious blokes who consider me to be an idiot…not a necessarily incorrect view. Most of these guys are young and when you are young, you tend to take yourself too seriously.
‘Cocaine.’ Clapton. Oh, the mémoires. How none of us had heart attacks is a mystery. But then I had three friends who were murdered over the devil’s drug. Worse than a heart attack. Begone darkness.
Great cigar. Maybe tough for a morning cigar due to its bombastic strength. I’m swimming in a sea of swarming simbas. Strong cigars cause longwindedness.
Flavor points are canonized. Not a very sophisticated blend, but a very tasty composite indeed.
For $7-$8, this cigar is a no brainer. It will smite newbies…but seasoned smokers will dig it.
You can purchase this blend and other H. Upmann sticks from sponsors: Small Batch Cigar (10% off with promo code ‘katman’) and Cigar Page.
RATING: 91
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Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS
