Wrapper: Cuban
Binder: Cuban
Filler: Cuban
Size: 5.5 x 54 Robusto Extra
Strength: Medium/Full
Price: $30.00
Box date: June 2019
THE WHOLE MEGILLAH:
Lawdy, this is a beautiful cigar. The wrapper is sepia bronze. Oil oozes like Elon on a good day.
Aromas include hot chocolate with marshmallows, strong cedar, maple syrup, and wet copper penny.
My PerfecPunch smoothly does its deed. Its rusty sheriff’s badge is poifect.
The cold draw is knock down sublime: clove, cinnamon, cedar, lemon and orange spritzer, leathery earthiness, red pepper, toasted cashews, and Coca Cola.
First puffs are doggone delicious, Jethro. I met the man at a birthday party for Alan Hale Jr (Gilligan’s Captain). He believed he was Elvis with the dyed black hairdo, shirt unbuttoned to his belly button, chains galore, rings on every finger, and a couple of high-class call girls on each arm. I tried talking to him, but he must have been too stoned as he had an inexplicable thousand yard stare.
Citrus and leathery richness, milk chocolate, black coffee, creamy cinnamon, and caramel. Bitchin.
The cigar’s strength is mild. Too mild but I’m a patient man. (I just lied).
The burn is wavering. I shall be patient.
Preparing for the Hollywood Palladium event, Butch Patrick and I met with Grandpa Munster several times at Art’s Delicatessen in Studio City. A very popular and busy place. Al Lewis loved the attention he got. Everyone stared at us. I found it unsettling as folks were trying to figure out who the third wheel was. The first time we lunched together, I started whining about the project and Al lit into me. He raised his voice and told me that if I couldn’t stand the pressure, that maybe show biz ain’t for me. I was so embarrassed. But Al let it go, and I never whined again in front of him, and he never brought it up again.
Grandpa was a star studded mensch and always insisted on paying for our meals despite me trying to wrestle the check from him. What surprised me was the reasonable fee that Al wanted for hosting the Halloween event: $500. I figured he was only asking a token amount because he was a good friend to Butch. Like most celebrities I met, I wish I was Al’s manager instead of Butch’s.
Smoke output is thin. The cigar is lackluster. I begin to worry. I had a reasonable fear that after reviewing the Romeo y Juliet Wide Churchill yesterday, I might be spoiled. But then every cigar I smoked subsequent to the RyJ was a huge disappointment.
Flavors coagulate. Cinnamon becomes Red Hot candy. The caramel is now every senior’s friend: Werther’s. The hot cocoa switches up to Mexican mole sauce. The citrus mellows into custardy sweetness. Baked apple shows up for the first time with spices of nutmeg and clove. Maybe the worm is turning.
The cigar won’t stay lit. First thing out of my perishing brain is that reviewing a one off is always a bad idea.
Strength surges. The mildness disappears. Medium/full shows up with no introduction. And I have a long way to go. Oh no.
At 1-1/2” burned, it seems conclusive. The cigar improves and meets my expectations. This is a highly sought after cigar and highly rated by critics.
The burn line refuses any consistency.
A cigar at this price point should include a clitoris buffing kit. Does it? No. Oh wait…
The most I can say, as the first half detonates, is that this is a very pleasant blend. But if I want pleasant, I’d rather a cheap hooker take care of me in a gas station’s filthy restroom.
Speaking of Janis Joplin…I was at the platinum record party for The Police’s “Zenyatta Mondata” in Hollywood. Hundreds of industry folk there. I found myself standing next to Bette Midler. She had no make up on and was tinier than I expected. I told her about my days in Curved Air with Sonja Kristina. And how her movie “The Rose” not only depicted a tragic figure like Janis; but the story was also similar to what Sonja went through, but with a decidedly different outcome. She was very polite and nice and then walked away and forgot about me forever. I told myself she was just overcome with my virile masculinity and had to leave or be tainted for life.
The lousy char line is pissing me off. Lovers of Cuban cigars tend to overlook construction issues because they paid so damn much for the pleasure of their company. The burn on yesterday’s RyJ was flawless.
Complexity is mildly entertaining. The richness is in middle earth. Transitionally, the blend is balmy and placid.
The cigar won’t stay lit. Constant relighting doesn’t do the flavor profile any favors.
This may be a prime example of getting a bad stick. I hear from you all the time about concerns that something you smoked behaved poorly. I don’t purchase Cubans very often because of price points that don’t insure excellent construction…and it’s not like you can complain to the people who sold it to you.
Lighting the cigar every few minutes has put the kibosh on the thing. I’m done.
RATING: 89
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Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS
Thanks again , Katman- disappointing outcome this time around. How much time idid this puppy spend in the humidor ? I’m curious bc a box of Serie D #4’s has been sitting in my humidor for about a year now.
I resonate with your sentiment , “I don’t purchase Cubans very often because of price points that don’t insure excellent construction…and it’s not like you can complain to the people who sold it to you.”
Peace!
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I have a checkered past with Cuban Partagás blends.
I rated the Serie D No. 5 with 97. I rated the Maduro No.1 with 86. I rated the Lusitania with 88.
All have 3-5 years humidor time.
Honestly, it could be me…and my unpredictable palate.
My advice is to Google the shit out these blends and get a wide array of opinions.
Thanks for your comment,
Phil
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Well, THAT sucks. Really disappointing. The Cuban Partagas Serie E No. 2 and the Partagas Lusitanias are tied as my personal favorite cigars, period. BUT… you just can’t get around the inconsistency of Cubans. I do find the most consistent Cuban to be the Partagas Serie E No. 2, at least for me – and also the Serie E No. 4. But again, still more inconsistent than good non-Cubans. The Lusitanias tends to be more inconsistent. Bummer.
I just can’t say why I’m so addicted to Cubans. Clearly a mental defect.
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“Doctor, my eyes have seen the years
And the slow parade of fears without crying
Now I want to understand
I have done all that I could.”
Jackson Browne is as close as I’m getting to The Eagles.
It was a big mistake reviewing a cigar with only one sample. Most of the time, it works out fine.
But now I’ve provided sequential proof of my dunderheadness about a cigar blend, and brand, that everyone loves.
Yeah, sure…you have a mental defect, but not about Cubans. If not for the lonely Isle of Lucy, we wouldn’t have PerfecSmoke. There’s always a balance.
As always, my doctor, thanks for your comment.
Phil
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Yup. Partagas E2, Lusitania, and D4 or D5 are top of the line for me, too (You typed E4… probably meaning D4 I think). R&J Wide Churchill are right up there when they hit. Of course when one of these sticks tickles my palate it ruins the rest of my day for another cigar. Then there’s our friend Phil… 🤔🤣. You need to have a little chat with our boy.
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OK Phil. Take a week off. I fear that Wide Churchill wrecked you. Smoke a few Quorums and Gurkas from the liquor store to re-calibrate your gustation / olfactory systems.
In college I flew to see a girlfriend in Stockholm. Rating: 10 of 10. I then returned to my girlfriend in Stockton. Rating: uhhhh, never mind. (used to be a 10… 😉 )
Same scenario…. reset needed.
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I know, I know…
Thanks for your comment brother…
Phil
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