Wrapper: Habano
Binder: Undisclosed
Filler: Undisclosed
Size: 5.5 x 58 Gordo
Strength: Medium/Full
Price: $32.50

BACKGROUND:
From Didier Cigars:
“Didier Lazare Benitah, a man whose name has become synonymous with luxury cigars, embraces a story that transcends continents and industries. Born in the heart of Paris, France, he found his home in the vibrant city of Miami, Florida, where he has resided for over two decades. Envision a lifestyle immersed in the allure of top-tier productions and star-studded initiatives. For Didier, opulence extends beyond the glitz of red carpets and meetings with celebrities. It lies in the subtle skill of creating an impeccable, hand-rolled cigar.

“Though renowned for his work at Season Productions, Didier’s true passion lies in sculpting exceptional smoking experiences for discerning palates. His journey began with an appreciation for cigars kindled during his extensive travels. The parallels between their refinement and the world of fashion sparked a creative fire, leading him to craft cigars for close friends and personal enjoyment. Soon, the whispers of his artistry reached beyond his inner circle, captivating international clients and events.

“What sets Didier Cigars apart? Unwavering dedication to quality. Didier personally sources the finest, rarest tobacco leaves, meticulously formulating each blend like a master perfumer. He knows every leaf’s story, every subtle note, ensuring each cigar transcends the ordinary. His collections are as diverse as the world he inhabits, evolving and refining like fine wine. Whether you seek a robust intensity or a mellow whisper, Didier offers a masterpiece to captivate your senses.

“His cigars are the culmination of passion, precision, and respect for the art of fine tobacco. Didier Cigars: A legacy of exquisite taste, sculpted for the true connoisseur. Explore a world where every puff reveals a new layer of complexity, where craftsmanship elevates the ordinary, and where every cigar becomes a personal treasure.
• Globally recognized as a meticulous creator of high-end blends.
• A reputation for producing some of the finest cigars in the world.
• Highly sought-after collections among cigar aficionados.
• Sophistication with luxury and elegance in the cigar world.

About the Joseph:
“The rich, deeply profound flavor of the Joseph Cigar is derived from a carefully selected blend of sweet tobacco, which is combined with earthy and cedar notes to create a complex and satisfying taste profile.

“The result is a smoke that is both bold and nuanced, with a depth of flavor that is sure to satisfy even the most discerning cigar aficionados. The construction of the Joseph Cigar is truly remarkable, featuring 100% Cuban Method construction.

“This means that the cigar is made entirely by hand, using only the finest quality tobacco leaves, and rolled with meticulous attention to detail. The result is a cigar that burns evenly, with a smooth draw and a satisfying aroma.

“One of the most notable features of the Joseph Cigar is its size. At 58 ring gauge, it allows for a more complex and nuanced smoking experience, as the larger ring gauge allows for a greater range of flavors to be present in the smoke. Despite its larger size, the Joseph Cigar is a medium to full-bodied smoke that is extremely well balanced.

“Every part of your palate will be satisfied, as the flavor profile is perfectly balanced to deliver a smooth and satisfying smoking experience.
“From the first draw to the last, the Joseph Cigar is sure to impress and delight even the most discerning cigar connoisseurs.”

THE WHOLE MEGILLAH:
Wow. I haven’t included this much brouhaha background ever. Mr.Benitah is portrayed as the second coming, which ties in beautifully with the holiday. I’m guessing that producing cigars in the $30-$50 range means Didier is slumming it for the Western World. I’m pretty sure that the cigars he produces for the elite, not you, run $1000 a pop. I have extremely high expectations.

It’s an oily bloke but not particularly stunning looking. The three red cigar bands pair nicely with the reddish hue of the wrapper. How does it smell? I’ll tell you…like not much. Shoving the fat cigar as far up my proboscillated natural opening, I get slight hints of hay, more hay, sweet fruitiness, coffee, barnyard, and pepper.

I truly dislike the hubris of companies that refuse to tell us poor mice what leaves they use…and then charge an arm and a leg. They think that we should behave like sophisticates when we aren’t. We are everyday working stiffs who enjoy a good cigar. Viaje does this a lot. So, fuck them. I’m going to say fuck a lot more in my reviews for the coming new year.

Using three fingernails and my PerfecPunch in coordination with the septic nature of my good countenance, I create a blow hole in the cap. The cold draw is sassfrasy with added notes of dark chocolate, espresso, mint, charcoal, and black and red peppers.

With all the hoopla about this guy, I expect a thrill of a lifetime going in.
And the opening salvo is pretty good with savory notes of dry red wine, brisket with tomatoes, roasted almonds, black pepper, earthiness, some real depth, and black coffee.

On the sweet side, I taste a frootsie tootsie, (I stop and consult the Flavor Wheel because I’m not a fancy guy that can rip off a bunch of exotic notes like I’m reciting the results of my drug screen), black currants, brown sugar, and sweet cream. See, it is much easier for your palate to discern things if you give it a leg up…instead of struggling with that “Nice smoke output’ dumb ass look on a reviewer’s face. Ever notice that some video reviewers look like serial killers? I have a face for radio.

This is a nice cigar in its early stages. I may have to take back all the crap I said.

From Earnest Hemingway: “The great thing is to last and get your work done and see and hear and learn and understand; and write when there is something that you know; and not before, and not too damned much after.”

I bravely attempted the first part. But blew the last part.

And then a strange flavor appears. I think it’s fentanyl laced Cocoa Puffs. A slight bitterness or musty element that just popped up out of nowhere. I hope it passes. In fairness, I’ve only had the cigars for a couple months…but it’s been aged by the blender for 3 years. And in more fairness, this is a giant Gordo minus half an inch. These things take forever to smooth out. I don’t like the size at all. So why did I buy them? Fuck if I know. I’m a stupid man.

The flavor profile becomes random. It has lost its earthiness and depth. How does that happen?

I just returned from a doctor appointment where I had a retroactive prostate exam. That’s right. I stuck my own hand up my own ass yesterday after dinner and kept my paw wrapped in silicone and nylon wool. Since I don’t jerk off anymore, there was no conflict of interest.

The first inch started great until the ¼” mark. And then it fell into the land of a $3 Oliva 2nd and stayed there. I’m at inch two. 33 fucking dollars for one cigar. $166 for a fiver. I am a true moron of exceptional proportions.

There is nothing going on. I should be getting some sort of sign from Almighty God that this cigar will age well. I always get signs because I stopped jerking off long ago. Or did I?

There is a sour aftertaste doing reps. Holy shit. I found only one review of Didier’s wares of which there are 7 blends. All expensive. This guy is flying high on his reputation as a star fucker. Just because a cigar smoker has money doesn’t mean he has a decent palate. In fact, the guys I’ve known with too much dough have palates like a 16-year-old girl working at Taco Bell.

There is no sign of life as the first half winds down. 45 minutes of my time. The shit I do for the unrequited love of you, my readers. Thankfully, I have the Haig’s number on speed dial.

This must be a joke. The cool hand looking luke on the Didier Cigar webpage is probably fake. The blender must be a 90-year-old woman who shreds like Eddie van Halen and lives in a walkup in Boseman. She calls up her connection at Oliva, orders a bunch of $1 cigars, spends $3 for fancy cigar bands, and comes up with a phony backstory that the rich, who eat their young, buy into because they’re dumb as posts.

Burn issues begin. $33 for a fucking cigar. This thing doesn’t even smell good. It smells like my Aunt Rhoda just before she kicked surrounded by open jars of chicken fat.

How shall I enumerate the positional quality of the first half? It cost me $16.50. That’s how I enumerate it. Screw the lack of flavors. If I want zero sum, I’ll smoke a Rocky Patel. I knew in 2023 that the cigar industry was coming for our gonadal scrotal area but they are landing punches in 2025 and beyond that allows them to laugh at our stupidity for handing over our weekly food money for a few hours of being left alone by the wife and kids.

Transitionally, there are no transitions unless you count anger, frustration, and morose behavior.

The fancy cigar bands mock me. My family mocks me too but they take my money with more grace.

I’m 3-1/2” into a 5-1/2” cigar. This cigar is a rat bastard piece of shit. Let the cigar industry sue me, I could give a fuck.

RATING: 60

Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS

Tags: cigar reviews, cigar reviews by the katman, cigars, Didier Cigars Joseph | Cigar Reviews by the Katman, katman, phil kohn