Wrapper: Ecuadorian Corojo Oscuro
Binder: Mexican San Andrés
Filler: Nicaraguan Ometepe, Pueblo Nuevo, Estelí, and ligero from Jalapa.
Size: 6 x 52 Toro
Strength: Medium/Full
Price: $5.00

THE WHOLE MEGILLAH:
These are pretty fancy leaf stats for a $5 cigar. Alex Gougher at Cigar Page sent me a few sticks for review. Did I laugh with a hearty guffaw? Damn straight I did.

The blender and manufacturer is Raymond Pages (pronounced Pah-hez). He spent years being AJ Fernandez’s right-hand man. He left the company and opened his own factory in Nicaragua.

The stick begins with a rough cob taste of unsweetened cocoa powder, black pepper, and creamy radish.

Construction is on point. I used to have a point but then I began writing cigar reviews. Now, I merely have memoranda dispersal.

The first inch morphs with richer elements of earthiness, less pepper notes, and more cocoa.

I was totally gearing up for hating this cigar. I want to hate it. I But I don’t. It very much reminds me of the AJ Fernandez branding. And if I must pin it down at this early point, it’s a cross between the Ramone Allones by AJ and the Artesano Del Tobacco Viva La Vida. Both very good cigars. What’s the catch? There ain’t none but you can snag the Your Mom for less than half the other cigars’ prices. This is the lure for customers.

The linguistics of Your Mom is a take on My Father by the Garcia family.

The flavor profile begins to drift into the arena of the Le Bijou 1922 100 Años with a giddy up of the My Father The Judge. Again, for less than half.

Inch 2 gets better. It’s getting harder to despise this blend. The creaminess intensifies. There are notes of sesame seeds, chocolate malt, aged leather goods, black cherries, deep earthiness, moderate black pepper, and sanguine meatiness. The savory v. sweet balance is noticeably half and half.

While having fun not rehearsing or touring, Stewart Copeland and I did a lot of nature walks. We always had at least a quarter ounce of hashish with us so we wouldn’t be bereft in case we got lost. Better to have dope in times of no money than to have money in times of no dope. The big downside was it was fucking England and as such, always cold. I missed SoCal but I adapted. Sometimes our singer, who would later become his first wife, came along. But like most chicks, she would complain a lot about being in the wilderness. To compensate, she would administer first aid in the genre of blow jobs. The thing I liked most about Sonja was that you never had to give her a head tap. She was masterful.

I hate that I’m saying this, but I’m having a good time with Your Mom. ? Because the strength is medium/full, I’m enjoying it early afternoon. It is able to cut right through a dirty palate.

Construction remains good. The char line is behaving. The roll is slow. And I gotta pee. Be right back.

Is this a unique blend? No. It’s about the price point. And if you have reward points stored up, Cigar Page may owe you money when you snag a fiver or tenner.

On the Cigar Page webpage for Your Mom, there is a short review video. Alex said it would be a great idea if these boys had me as a guest. Apparently, they’re not interested. I get this a lot.

The cocoa powder excels as the first half comes to an end. It’s really good. Incessant lip licking is a good sign.

Sonja loved to show us her new boobs. It was obsession-like. Better than that, she would show off the latest dyed color of her pubes or the new curated design. She was the first, and only, woman I knew who had an operation in which she had her labia trimmed to perfection. We got to see that a lot too.

There is no fucking around in the strength department. I got a buzz. This is an after-dinner smoke, not a morning cigar.

The second half is smoother and much more flavorful. There is just enough mild complexity that it is hard not to huff and puff constantly. I tangle my smoking hand with twines I found in the litter box. I believe they’re twines.

I’ve got Porn Hub on in Farsi. The women are wearing burkas. I feel dirty.

Why is it that in movies and tv series, people aren’t afraid to walk barefoot in men’s bathrooms. Apparently, the producers have only used private bathrooms when their bosses were at lunch. The leftist elite.

I love the creaminess. This very much reminds me of something that AJ would blend.

My sticks have less than a month of home detention so I’m guessing you can chain smoke these things upon receipt. Aging might fuck them up.

Your Mom comes in four sizes: Corona, Toro, Torpedo, and Gordo. What…no Robustos?

Once, Copeland wanted to ingest some wild mushrooms we found on a walk. We were already high, but it seemed pretty stupid to take a chance of wiping out the Curved Air rhythm section in one fell swoop. I convinced him to give them to me, and I’d hand them over later. By the time ‘later’ happened, he forgot my promise. Because I’m a good friend, I gave them to the roadies. They ate them with no repercussions. The all-knowing sense of what and who roadies are continued uninterrupted.

The last third is pretty damn good. I hate this. I was either going to slam these fuckers or just not review them as a courtesy…and yet, here I am, telling you they are more than decent.

You can’t go wrong with this deal. If you like a solid Nic blend with some kick to it, Your Mom won’t steer you in the direction of insomnolence or droopy eye…or saggy tortial remains.

I most definitely rate cigars based upon price. Therefore, the rating below is an adaptation of a conundrum.

I just noticed that you can buy 30 Toros for $100. After the promo code, it’s $2.83 per stick. This is madness. I’m not going to bother Alex begging for more. I can afford $3 per cigar.

You can purchase these cigars from sponsor Cigar Page. Once again, Alex Gougher stepped up and brings you a 15% discount with promo code YOMAMA26.

RATING: 90

Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS

Tags: cigar page, cigar reviews, cigar reviews by the katman, cigars, katman, phil kohn, raymond pages, Your Mom by Raymond Pages | Cigar Reviews by the Katman