Strain– Gorilla Cookies
Type– 50/50 Hybrid (Even)
Parent Strains– Gorilla Glue, Gorilla Cookies, and Girl Scout Cookies
Price– $20.00 per gram
Purchased from– The Broccoli Barrel

Another guest review by Calvin Kushman

Gorilla Cookies:

Gorilla Glue:

Girl Scout Cookies:

PROLOGUE:
12:01am
I’m supposed to be at work in 3 hours. I haven’t slept at all.
I have been stoned since 8 PM. I have been through more perilous work walking on razor blade-type situations before. Can I make it through tonight’s 8 hour shift?
It’s time to smoke once again.
I mean, what kind of review would it be if I didn’t smoke while reviewing? A cigar review? HA HAA….

AROMAS:
Okay, from the opened bag, I take a whiff and smell: Sweet candy, citrus, diesel fuel, sage, nutmeg, seasoning spices, and Wonder bread.

THE LOW DOWN:
This hybrid is really nice. It’s a highly potent strain yet the intensity of the high isn’t overpowering. This surprises me as both parent strains have a common consistency as top shelf quality.
Gorilla Glue is quite a powerful Sativa dominant hybrid. It was reportedly the most popular strain at college parties last year, which I suppose isn’t necessarily a good thing but it really seemed that way when I wrote it down on paper.
The other main parent strain; Girl Scout Cookies, is a very powerful Indica dominant hybrid.

FLAVORS AND THE BUZZ:
As time is very limited right now, I can only smoke one joint for this review.
Immediately, there is an uncanny effect that makes you feel like you’re floating in the air; yet keeping you couch locked.

At the first light, I immediately taste a slice of bread lightly toasted with fine sugar on top.
After the second hit, that sweet toast has been dipped into gasoline and sprinkled with a bit of nutmeg and Mrs. Dash seasoning.

Remarkably right about halfway down the joint, the flavor really reminds me of kettle cooked popcorn.
In a blink of an eye, my body feels fatigued and heavy. I realize now that I shouldn’t review this late after a long day of running around town searching for an available wife. Yes, I tend to be a busy man and now as I exhale the sweet tasty smoke, the last reserves of my strength and stamina are instantly depleted.

My legs are aching from standing for so long. This was not the best idea I have ever had but it is too late to turn back. I have 2 more hours til I leave for work.

RELAXING:
Although knowing it is the last thing I should do right now, I sit in my recliner and play some video games. Gaming was once my favorite hobby.
That was until I got into competitive multiplayer gaming. Within a year, a deep resentment made its way to my heart.
If you ever have an urge to experience humiliation by a bunch of 15 year olds, get involved in competitive video gaming. You will understand what I mean.

EPILOGUE:
It’s about 3:15 when the phone rang and woke me up. Damn! I tell my boss I’ll be right there….as soon as I roll a joint for the drive over there.

The following charts are from leafly.com.
Strain effects:

Strain medical:

Strain negatives:

From leafly.com….
Left to right….Sativa, Indica, and Hybrid:

From Green Doctor Network:
Cannabis Sativa:
“Sativa strain types are known to produce an uplifting and cerebral high that is typically very energizing and stimulating. Sativa are known to make you laugh uncontrollably or engage in in-depth conversations about the meaning of life. These strains typically cause you to analyze the human experience and think creatively, which makes Cannabis Sativa very popular among philosophers, artists and musicians. Some Sativa have even been found to enhance lights and sounds, making music, movies, and the rest of your surroundings more vibrant than ever before.”

Cannabis Indica:
“The effects produced by Indica strain types are very relaxing and narcotic-like, typically providing a full-body, or “couch-locked” effect. Indica are perfect for those days spent curled up on the couch watching TV, or surfing the web. However, most people use Cannabis Indica after a long day at work to relieve stress, provide full-body pain relief, and help them fall asleep at night.

“Indica strains are ideal for chronic pain, muscle spasms, anxiety, nausea, appetite stimulation, and sleep deprivation. Individuals who suffer from diseases like multiple sclerosis, fibromyalgia, lupus, sleep apnea and insomnia tend to benefit from the effects of Cannabis Indica.”

Hybrids:
“There are a wide range of cannabis strains in between Indica and Sativa. These strains are known as “Hybrids” and show traits directly related to the genetics in its lineage. Hybrids can be broken down into three basic categories:
1). “Sativa-dominant Hybrids: Cerebral high with a relaxing body effect. Provides physical and mental relief.
2). “Even Hybrids (50/50): Ideal strains for people seeking a perfect balance of head and body.
3). “Indica-dominant Hybrids: These strains provide a full-body pain relief, with a relaxing head high. Recommended for nighttime use to go to sleep, or daytime relief from minor pain. These strains are perfect for patients who suffer from all types of autoimmune diseases as well as insomnia or depression.”

According to Popular Science:
“If you’re an adult who has smoked marijuana in the past year, you’re one of about 30 million Americans who has done so, according to a new survey by the National Institute on Alcohol Abuse and Alcoholism (NIAAA). That’s 9.5% of our population.”

THIS IS NOT A RECOMMENDATION TO CONSUME ILLEGAL SUBSTANCES. I am simply trying to educate and shine the light on the medical uses for marijuana. We currently have 25 states that allow legal weed dispensaries in the United States. There is a lot of enlightenment in not only those states…but the other 25 who make it a misdemeanor to a felony for possession. If you choose to use medical marijuana, please do all the research you can before deciding on what is best for you.
Remember…Never smoke cannabis and drive. It is illegal the same as driving drunk in the law’s eyes. Not to mention how dangerous it is. Even if you are only driving 5mph because the cannabis has made you paranoid.

Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS

Tags: Gorilla Cookies Cannabis - Guest Review - Cigar Reviews by the Katman