Wrapper: Nicaraguan Maduro
Binder: Nicaragua
Filler: Nicaragua
Size: 5 x 52 Perfecto ~ Box Pressed
Strength: Full
Price: $13.50
THE WHOLE MEGILLAH:
Andre Farkas, and his brand Viaje, has become one of the most reliable line of cigars of all time. His wares sell out toot suite. Especially the limited-edition cigars. My only issue is that many blends age out after a year or so. The upside to that problem is you must smoke them sooner rather than later. There are worse problems for a cigar smoker.
I have all three editions of the 2025 Zombie Biohazard: Green, Black, and Red. I will review the Black and Green in the near future. For the most part, I prefer to review cigars that are readily available instead of creating angst among my readers from giving a rave review to something they can never buy.
The box pressed cigars are snappy in their appearance with an oily finish and day old scruffle that feels like fine sandpaper. The cigar bands verge on being Joe Camel-ish with their 1982 horror film noir look. The box press is neither sharp nor soft…very Goldilocks apropos. Each perfecto shape is consistent from one stick to another.
The wrapper’s aromas are sweet with notes of freshly washed black cherries, BBQ sauce, dark chocolate, espresso, cut and diced red bell pepper, baking spices, and just a touch of barnyard.
The 8mm (5/16”) punch on my PerfecPunch is optimal for this dirty job. It lifts the cap easily and I’m in business. But the draw is dead in the water. Do I panic? A little. But my trusty PerfecDraw goes to work. But wait, before I do, I task Humidimeter and it comes back as 65%. Still, the PD doesn’t do its job. As I’m huffing and trying to seek air, my eyes see that the foot is closed. Du-oh. If you wonder if this old man is in decline, I vote yes. I clip the foot and voila, it is a free bird. My PerfecDraw requires endorsement so I tap it gently on its tiny shoulders and it scampers off with a healthy dose of self-validation. Any other reviewer would have used a #5 eraser and gotten rid of one’s own dumbness, but I don’t have time to use my lifetime supply of Liquid Paper.
The cold draw continues the theme of sweetie pie baby with notes of cherries secured in puff pastry, chocolate chip cookie dough, black pepper, red pepper, blackstrap molasses, French fries with ketchup, and baking spices. Damn, I qualify for a job with Ezra Zion.
A big whoosh of chocolate fudge and earthy behavior. Immediate sumptuousness and vibrancy that belies a simple Nic puro profile. Farkas has a way with leaves. As I suck like my first day at Boy Scout camp, there are further notes of salty pretzel, smoked brisket, chocolate covered espresso beans, green bell pepper, cinnamon and clove, and a healthy dose of black pepper. I believe I’ve nailed the EZ job.
In my old age, accompanied by massive decline, I’ve become a little obsessed with The Three Stooges. After finding the 24-hour channel called Three Stooges+, the obsession has landed like drone attacks on Venezuelan drug boats. So, I occasionally have the boys streaming while I write. The late 1950’s version of the Stooges is sad. The guys are in their late 50’s, Shemp and Curly are gone, and there is no vigor left in these older men. It is not easy to remember nearly 70 years ago when I was 7, but I remember vividly how disappointed I was seeing less vigorous Stooges compared to the 1930’s Stooges. But that didn’t stop my friends and I going to theater matinees of the silliness done in full motion picture presentations. It was always a good time and we forgave the Stooges for getting older.
Construction is like a tank. The slow roll contradicts the diminutive size of the cigar. It takes 20 minutes to smoke the first inch. The draw and airflow resistance is on the money. The char line is dead nuts. And the ash is structurally sound. I am currently not afraid of dangling it over my lap. That will change as my odds decrease.
The nutty chocolate nougat is upfront and proud enough for a parade down Main St. The BBQ sauce influence is subtle with a nice cayenne afterthought. The pastry dough is working nicely and even though the blend seems sweet heavy, the balance is filtered through a wonderful earthy richness that provides a leathery undertone.
Around 1962, I entered a Soupy Shuffle contest at the JCC. Soupy Sales incorporated Curly’s shuffle into his own thing. The only difference is that Soupy added a side to side move that was pretty cool. I was awarded third place which I remember to this day. Soupy himself handed me the ribbon. I held on to that prize until is I was in my 40’s when it was eventually lost to the gods of brown storage boxes.
Savory notes jump in with a buttery fried egg flavor topped with just enough salt and black pepper. This is a first for me. Probably a brain aneurysm on my horizon.
Inch two shows off its stuff. Buttered popcorn, smoked brisket, and earthy delights. Savory has staked out its place in the cigar’s profile. The balance is spot on now. I just happened to like a 50/50 of Sweet v. Savory when I can get it. I know it’s not important to most smokers, but we all have our distinct Joneses. Reviewers don’t speak for the masses. We speak for ourselves hoping that a few of you find solace in a grand sweep of consolidarity. In the end, it’s all down to ‘I like it or I don’t.’ So far, this cigar is giving me a whole lotta love.
The first half (45 minutes) of the Zombie Biohazard Red was great. A smooth ride for this Nic puro. The Maduro version is a perfectly balanced blend with charming tones and effortless approval ratings. But will it survive the crucial second half and reward me with a sweet spot we all look forward to?
I take a sip of coffee to recharge myself. Amazingly, the next puff tastes like coffee. How does Farkas do that? A sip of water and the baseline flavors are readjusted.
Viaje gives this blend a full-strength rating. The first half began at medium and then shifted to medium/full at the 2-1/2” mark. I can feel the attack in my ability to type. But my brain is clear. There is a joke there but I’ll let you fill in the blanks.
As the shorts move on endlessly, I am gifted with a 1939 Stooges vignette. The boys were at their height in this period. In the 1950’s, without the advantage of streaming, we young boys were able to watch the Stooges before and after school. Playtime in the afternoon always hit the pause button so we could rush home and enjoy slapstick at its finest. Young children now are glued to their tablets while playing video games. I fear that the love of The Three Stooges is on a downward slide to oblivion. It’s a shame because the men were timeless in their comedy chops.
I can always test nicotine levels by how difficult the removal of cigar bands becomes. In this case, the secondary band comes off with no issues. There is no wonkiness from my fingers. I don’t mind a full-strength cigar if the nicotine is in abeyance.
The flavor points find a centrality. It is as if they condense like a can of Campbell’s soup. The essences become horizontally efficacious. Their approach is about complexity and depth. Transitions are johnny on the spot.
Strength is in killer mode. But I can still type. Cherries, smoked meat, cinnamon, red and black pepper, fried eggs, vegetal notes, extreme earthiness, pretzel logic, cayenne, puff pastry, and dark chocolate fudge.
The blend is a winner. I must admit that when I see leaf stats without exotic leanings, I am wary. Another clone? Not in this case. A superb cigar. I’d stock up on them as well as the Green and Black versions. Production numbers are only 980 cigars per blend, so I’m confident that they will vanish minutes from now.
You can purchase the Viaje Zombie Biohazard series from sponsor Small Batch Cigar. Take 10% off with promo code KATMAN.
RATING: 96
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Categories: CIGAR REVIEWS
Pretzel Logic, lol. Good album!
CHEERS
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